Thursday, March 29, 2007

Another Beautiful Day

I promised pictures, but in transferring data from one computer to another the program I used is gone forever. Dh loaded the one that came with the camera. Great! But I don't know how to use it :-( By the time I have time to play with it, he is fast asleep. So I will have to postpone show and tell until I can get him to sit with me.

I have really enjoyed being outdoors for the past two days. On Tuesday, it felt like early summer. I took my little pumpkin to the zoo and Van Saun and then to the playground they have there. I am so out of shape, that by the time we left, I was dead tired. My gd kept asking me to carry her, but I need someone to carry me. The park was packed and of course we had to park at the furthest parking spot. We got to the zoo at 1pm got home after 5pm. I got home so exhausted, I could not cook. Pizza never tasted so good! Had a glass of wine, watched American Idol, life felt good.

Wednesday, I woke up a little tired so I did not want to do as much walking. But I took pumpkin to a play group, then to the library (she loves it) we had lunch outdoors and then went home. Another good day.

I did manage to cook dinner! However, I just don't know how some people do it. Three years ago, I quit my job to stay at home with my gd and my dd could go back to work. I thought it would be great to be able to be home and work on things I never got a chance to. I thought I would be able to pursue some hobbies, maybe start an online business. Start projects on my home that I never got around to. Ha, I have never had so little time to myself. I only manage to crochet at night while the rest of my family sleeps. I have a difficult time keeping the house clean, doing the shopping, laundry, cooking. I am beginning to feel that I am inept. I used to manage all this with a full time job. Yesterday, my dd tells me they are trying to have another baby and she hopes to be pregnant by the summer. Of course, I am happy to be a nana again. But, OMG, how can I handle 2. I really think I must be doing something wrong. Maybe I am just old. I didn't feel old until I stopped working, what's up with that?

Ok, I really don't want to complain. I don't want to give myself some bad karma or allow myself not to enjoy what I have. I need to count my blessings and hope for the best.

1 comment:

Cammye said...

I just felt a connection with you, lol. I feel that way all the time. I have three little ones, well not so little: 7, 9, and 17. I only work 3 hrs a day. Plenty of time to work, start my online/local business (I hoped), get my new house in the shape I want, garden ( my relaxation ) and time to care for the kids. They are in school for goodness sake. Of course I'm the "room mom" and I volunteer at the school as needed. I should be able to do this right? But I have had the same doubts recently as you. I just know, as I'm sure you know, that we are doing the best we can and the time we are investing into these little lives is the most important thing we can do with out lives and has the longest lasting real! rewards. My grandmother "raised" (took care of me while my mom worked) me and I could NEVER say enough about how much she means to me, how much better my life is because of her. OK I'll shut up now, I just applaude what you are doing, we need more grandmothers like you these days.